Rooms With a View

IN THE LOO~

Still Suffering from my Tysabri headache. I wanted to share these fun photos courtesy of my brother Brian. Enjoy!

Would you use this restroom?

This scene is painted on the bathroom floor.

This scene is painted on the ceiling of a smokers lounge.

Have a great Thanksgiving. I want to tell my three readers how thankful I am for you!

BEETLES, FROGS & BABIES

After my nice pampering hair cut yesterday I decided to check out the pool. The kids and I got in on Wednesday night even though it was quite chilly. It was actually quite pleasant yesterday with the exception of what was floating around. Here is what I scooped out of the pool...

Need a close up?

Yes, those are beetles with a few wolf spiders mixed in. We have never had this many before and the only thing we can think of is that when the termite guy came out for our inspection on Monday, he knocked them all lose. Beetles were not the only thing I found in the pool....

Patrick retrieving the other friend out of the pool.

And here he is. Frogs are not an unusual visitor to our pool. This is a little late for frogs though. Once we got him out he sat by the diving board for a while then Vinny checked on him to see if he was still alive and he jumped back into the pool. I was able to get him out and he jumped away into the grass.

Now, I have a video to share. Enjoy and I hope you have a glorious weekend.

OUT OF THE MOUTHS OF BABES...

A little funny from my sister in law, Anna. Enjoy....

The Children's Bible in a Nutshell

In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas.  The Bible says, 'The Lord thy God is one, but I think He must be a lot older than that. 

Anyway, God said, 'Give me a light!' and someone did. 

Then God made the world.

He split the Adam and made Eve.  Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet. 

Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden.....

Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars.

Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel.

Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.

One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. 

Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check. 

After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.  Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. 

Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.

Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. 

Moses led the Israel Lights out of

Egypt

and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people.  These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.

 God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti.  Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments. These include: don't lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor's stuff.

Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor thy father and thy mother. One of Moses' best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies.  Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.

After Joshua came David.  He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn't sound very wise to me.

After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets.  One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore. There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don't have to worry about them.

After the Old Testament came the New Testament.  Jesus is the star of The New.  He was born in

Bethlehem

 in a barn.  (I wish I had been born in a barn too, because my mom is always saying to me, 'Close the door! Were you born in a barn?' It would be nice to say, 'As a matter of fact, I was.')

During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Democrats.
Jesus also had twelve opossums.

The worst one was Judas Asparagus.  Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.

Jesus was a great man.  He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount.

But the Democrats and all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot.  Pilot didn't stick up for Jesus.  He just washed his hands instead.

Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again.  He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum.  His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.

MS SUCKS!

I hope you are all having a wonderful Labor Day. I am spending mine in the hospital due to a nasty relapse. I promise to post more later when I am not so drowsy. Here is a little funny ( long and well worth it)  for your day courtesy of my friend Helene...

I just want to thank all of you for your educational e-mails over the past year.   I am totally screwed up now and have little chance of recovery.  I no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel or have them put lemon slices in my ice tea without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel. I can't use the remote in a hotel room because I don't know what the last person was doing while flipping through the adult movie channels.                             I can't sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed. I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking ones nose (although cell phone usage may be taking the number one spot).                 Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years. I can't touch any woman's purse for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public bathroom. I MUST SEND MY SPECIAL THANKS to whoever sent me the one about poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing.    ALSO, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason. I no longer have any money, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program. I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's Novena has granted my every wish. I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day. THANKS TO YOU I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes. BECAUSE OF YOUR CONCERN, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains. I no longer can buy gasoline without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm pumping gas. I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put 'Under God' on their cans.  I no longer use Saran Wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer. AND THANKS FOR LETTING ME KNOW I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face... disfiguring me for life. I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS. I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me. I no longer receive packages from UPS or Fed Ex since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise. I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our American troops or the Salvation Army. I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a  number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica , Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan. I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe. THANKS TO YOU  I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my butt. AND THANKS TO YOUR GREAT ADVICE  I can't ever pick up $5.00 dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg. I can no longer drive my car because I can't buy gas from certain gas companies! I can't do any gardening because I'm afraid I'll get bitten by the brown recluse and my hand will fall off. If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 p.m tomorrow afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump.  I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician . .. Oh, by the way...... A German scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse. Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.

AN E CARD FROM MY LOVING HUSBAND!

When I checked my email yesterday morning, I found that my loving and very funny husband had sent me an E Card. So, I thought I would share it with you. Enjoy...just click on the link below.

Rattlebox – Free Funny E Cards - Funny E Cards for Free | Rattlebox Shared via AddThis

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS?

Have you seen this video? Over 12 million people have so if you are one of those 12 million, I apologize. I think it is worth a second, third of fourth view. Watching this makes me want to get married again. Well, not re-married, just have another wedding. Enjoy!

A FUNNY FOR YOU!

Charlie sent me this joke yesterday and I just had to share it....

I was in the pub yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to fart.
The music was really, really loud, so I timed my farts with the beat.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better.
I finished my pint and noticed that everybody was staring at me.

Then I suddenly remembered I was listening to my IPod.

I cannot write a post without a photo. This is from a class I am taking from the wonderful Jessica Sprague...

 

If you want to read the quote, just click on the photo and it will be enlarged. The technique of the photo is an antique finish plus a frame and a quote.

Have a groovy Wednesday!

BECOMING CATHOLIC MAKES YOU A BETTER READER!

I took so many photos of Vivian's Baptism that I decided to attempt to cut them down to a more reasonable amount. There are a few that I have to share just because they are so adorable. So, while I make some tough decisions I will share these...

 

Danny (the proud daddy) is holding Vivian and she decided she wanted to see what Mommy was reading.

 

Hey, this is some good stuff.

 

There are some really big words that I don't quite understand.

 

Hey Mom, have you read this? It is pretty interesting.

She was the cutest thing I have seen in a long time. We were all trying so hard not to crack up laughing. Seeing her makes me miss our little Catherine Siena and Isabella and Anna Maria. The latter two babies I have never met before. Catherine is now living in Wisconsin and boy do I miss her and her brothers. Sorry, I digress.

 

I will end with a photo of my prince and my beautiful princess. Thanks for stopping by and I hope you all have a fun and safe 4th of July.

HOW TO DUNK A PRETTY LADY!

Christi had no problem getting into the pool. The only thing she would not do was put her head under water. Well, Patrick found this to be a challenge and he never steps away from a challenge. So, here is how to dunk a beautiful woman...

 

The un-expecting victim.

 

The not so sneaky dunker...

 

Still unaware of what is headed her way.

 

Down she goes...

 

And she still looks amazing and fortunately she did not lose her contacts.

And the last great photo of the night...

 

Anna Kate, Vinny and Abigail. Are they not the cutest girls you have ever seen?

Thanks for stopping by.

THE CREATURES OF THE PADDOCK POOL.

When you put kids, drinking adults, and pool toys into a pool, you sometimes end up with some scary creatures. Friday night was no exception and thanks again to Al Jr. for photographing this dangerous assignment.

 

The Masked Creature aka Patrick.

 

The Screamer Creature aka Sam.

 

The Time Out Creature aka Mitchell.

 

The Giggle Creature aka Anna Kate.

 

The Hair Swooshing Creature aka Vinny.

 

The Beautiful Creature aka Christi and the Gray Haired Creature aka Me.

There were a couple of other creatures out and about in the pool that are just too scary to post.

Thanks for stopping by!